A Conversation I had yesterday

I have been thinking a lot of a conversation I had yesterday with an adult leader from the Kansas group. He was talking about the need to feel accomplishment and "to see the change you've enacted." He wanted to see something tangible; a before and after picture. He even said it was a necessity. I understand this thought. I've reflected and at times struggled with this same question. I told him after 8 weeks, in the grand scheme of things, I'm not sure of the impact of my being here.

I asked him, "Why?" Why is it necessary for you to have something tangible to point to? I began thinking about this exchange more in depth last night. Why is the before and after pic important and for whom?

I came to a realization last night that seeing a house, a project completed can be similar to building your treasures here on Earth; they are in themselves their own reward. The most profound and meaningful impacts are those that touch someone's life, get personal and relational, and the effects of which are most likely not immediately seen. I think impacting someone's life in a real, personal, and long-lasting way is on a different level of service. This doesn't necessarily take time, but definitely takes effort.

This deeper level of service also requires the faith that God was working with you, and will continue working after you. It is required to believe that God will provide in the end, despite all of the evidence around you pointing to otherwise. If one is really, truly serving, then its not about you. The long-lasting impact that you may never see the extent of is much more meaningful and more in line with Christ's view of selfless love. If you can serve at that level and have faith in God to provide, then what does it matter if you can point to a picture and say that's what I did. Paint will fade, houses will eventually need to be rebuilt, roofs will again need to be repaired, but loving someone and being in a personal relationship with them can possibly change things in a way you could never imagine or even be able to see.

So, after 8 weeks, I can leave here pointing to all the concrete (pun included) changes which in the grand scheme are minimal, or I can take away the intangible variables: The kids I've played with and shown attention, the people I've talked to/worked for, the patients whose hands I've held, the communications with Larry, and all of the things that may not even seem like much. I have faith that God was with me, and I think I can leave with faith that God will provide.

Paz,

Mateo